Dates Upon a Stone

A classmate of mine recently pondered "Where did the time go?" She's 30 and nearly panicked that she hasn't accomplished more in her life. It got me to thinking about a breakdown of my life in five year increments from age 10.

10 - Facing my parents divorce, moving...moving...moving.
15 - Moving across country (Texas to Maine) and adjusting to new school, friends, etc.
20 - Married, working full-time, living below poverty line, trying to survive being undereducated, newlywed, and young.
25 - Newly widowed, active duty military with plans for 20 year military career.
30 - Out of Navy, moving around the world (Hawaii to DC), mom of 2.5 year old, new college graduate, new career, obese.
35 - Moving around the world again (DC to Japan), adjusting to new culture, homeschooling only child, struggling with infertility, still obese, teaching ESL to Japanese people.
40 - Graduate student, homeschooling three children, volunteering, focusing on reclaiming fitness lost by: childbirths, inattention to self, emotional eating.

All of these transitions have been sometimes painful and other times joyful. Go figure that I tell people my middle name is Gumby. This represents not only a lot of change, but a lot of shifting of goals and priorities. Many times throughout represent the death of dreams that were incredibly difficult to let go, while others reflect great triumph. There have been so many things along the way - my moments in the middle. Like Mark Harris says in his song "The Line Between the Two":

A beginning and an ending, dates upon a stone
But the moment in the middle is how we will be known
Cause what defines us can be found within a line
Finding reason for our time

(Chorus:)
And the years go by, how they seem to fly
They'll all be over soon
When our life is done, did we live and love
The way we wanted to
Cause everyday that we leave behind
Goes on to tell the truth
Of how we lived in the line between the two
The line between the two

Will I walk straight, will I be true
Will I finish strong
Will I stand up for the moment
When I could right a wrong
Because the legacy we have will never change
It's how we spend our days

(Chorus)

I could live a life for just myself
Or I could live a life for someone else
But I'll live and die just to hear
You say
Well done my son come and be with Me

(Chorus)

I want to do more than simply live and breathe. If not now, when? The moment in the middle IS how we will be known. What do I want to leave behind? That is a question that will unfortunately have to wait for another time as I forge ahead with more school work. At this moment, I'm hopeful that all this work is going to be a catalyst for my upcoming "moments in the middle." I want to be leave behind so much more than just my dust in the wind.